Happy 2007

Another year has come and gone. wow. As I just sit and wait everyday I tend to forget how quickly time passes. Especially when you have kids. Unreal.
10 years ago I was pregnant with my son, we were living in North Carolina and I was in my mid-twenties.
Now, our son is 9 1/2, we're living back where we started from and I'm 10 years past my mid-twenties! (you can do the math!)
I remember like it was yesterday suffering with morning-noon-and night sickness, waiting IMPATIENTLY for the birth of my first baby, being so happy that we were in a place where it was 70 degrees in January......unreal. Where has the time gone? I just wanted so badly for my baby to be born.
The more things change, the more they stay the same......I'm still waiting, not for my baby to be born (although maybe that's the case), but for my baby to come home. If only I had to wait 9 months! I thought pregnancy was hard!!
I'm trying to wrap my mind and my heart around the fact that it may be 2 OR 3 MORE YEARS before we bring our daughter home. I just can't do it. I guess I'm in self-preservation mode. I can't let myself believe that it will take that long. I just can't.
Now, I have faith in God. I have faith that He can move mountains, work miracles and that prayer changes things. My faith is not as strong as it could/should be, but I'm working on it.
Not a day goes by, not a silent minute goes by without me praying for things to change in China. I pray that God would work miracles in our adoption. I know He knows what's in my heart. I know He listens to me when I pray. I KNOW that. And I think that's the thing that's keeping me going right now. I don't have control over anything. period. The ONLY thing that I can really do is trust in God and pray without ceasing. I'm a control FREAK and this whole "knowing that I don't have any control"-thing is really hard for me. But I do have control over prayer and how I handle things. So, I'll take what I can get. I will pray everyday and I will try my hardest not to give up on God, because He won't give up on me.
I just pray with all my heart that 2007 will be a better year for all of us (babies and parents, brothers and sisters, grandparents and aunts, uncles and cousins) who are waiting. Waiting with hope.